Why did all my Best friends leave Hyderabad?
I am stuck with a very strange predicament at the age of 25, as I grow older I realize it is getting more difficult to make friends. Predicting this I invested very early in friendships. My childhood friendships, all of which I formed before the age of 20 (That was the age I stopped climbing trees and being the aide to my kleptomaniac friend) were filled with wonderful memories. Nothing can replace growing up with someone, letting go of dumb ideas together or forming dumber ones together.
But all my investments turned to dust because I was from Hyderabad. Just to give you a perspective, over the last seven years the number of Telugu speakers in the US have increased by a whopping 86%, now either that means a lot of people from my state have shifted to US or Americans have suddenly started speaking Telugu. One year before I was ready to graduate from college all my friends started casually giving GRE, I even helped them prepare, it was fun learning the meanings of words like schadenfreude. But all the casual preparation turned serious as the final year was ending and I found most of my friends with admits for fall /spring of the coming year. It was like a mass movement, like the only thing to do after graduating from college. So my best friends from school left that December of 2014, and in the June of 2015, my college friends got bored with their jobs and left, to join the several others who had gone in December, and so by 2015, it was like all my childhood and undergrad friends had left. So next year when a report emerged that Hyderabad was issued the most F-1 visas from India it was no surprise, every lane, every family, in fact everyone in Hyderabad knows some if not many students who have gone to live the American dream. But strangely no other city in the country witnesses this phenomenon. So what makes Hyderabad students seek the American dream?
The Dollar Dream?
One Dollar was 63.465 in January and today it is 72.615, my friends are growing richer by the minute in INR. My friends save anywhere between 1–2 Lakhs per month (INR), it is incredibly difficult to get such a salary in India. A mere 3% get more than 10 Lakhs per year.
Groomed for US
From the first year of Engineering, there is always a discussion of US. There was so much talk of US in the air that I could hardly find anyone who hadn’t given the GRE, even those of us who weren’t going to the US, just gave the GRE, we just applied to colleges, we just wrote painful Statements of Purpose (A striking resemblance exists with those of my friends), got letters of recommendations from professors who were very kind, and applied. It was only when I got the admit, that I realized I didn’t fancy the idea of going to the US. And after much introspection I realized why, I was told once that my cousin in the US had to shovel snow every morning before he drove to work, I realized I wasn’t a snow person, I didn’t want to fret about carrying a jacket wherever I went, and so for that reason I chose to stay back.
The Future Bride/Bride-groom potential
The quality of your marriage prospects are known to get better when you step foot in the US. For families who still seek dowry for their boys, the value of the asset increases with a job in the US, a H1-B, a green card (In that order). For girls who still pay Dowry, the price decreases with a job in the US, H1-B ,a Green Card (In that order). When both the Bride and groom are from the US, it’s a win-win for parents on both sides
So where does that leave the friends in India?
I do stay in touch with my friends in the US, we have the occasional talk over the phone, on common things which are dwindling by the day. So to all those from Hyderabad who plan on not leaving India I would suggest you make Pen Pals from all over the country to diversify your risk, and to not face the pain of facing the ordeal of making new friends at the age of 25.
Luckily for me, I moved out of my city after college for work, I traveled to Gujarat, Maharashtra, Jamshedpur, and I am finally in Tamil Nadu for my work, I have met a lot of interesting people who are happy and content to stay in India, I have found some very good friends, but when I look at friends going on trips with their school friends it makes me realize of the several things we have missed after growing up, mainly the plans we made as kids for our adult selves.
R.I.P Childhood plans, Hello Adulting.
